Hey guys, About a week ago I had an epileptic seizure. I was diagnosed with photosensitive epilepsy at the age of 19 shortly after finishing basic training in the British Army. This effectively destroyed any ambition of me pursuing a career in the military and later law enforcement.It also greatly rocked pretty much every pursuit I had, namely parkour, martial arts, weight training and video games. I was put on a permanent prescription for sodium valproate and left to try and rebuild and redirect my life. At 19 not so bad really since I'd only been out of education for a short while and had some experience within the military to give me a grounding to get into work. What I never realised was the confidence knock it would have. I barely trained for around 4 months after my initial series of seizures and when I did start back training everything was done very tentatively and without the vigour I had before. I had to be very careful in parkour. I wasn't able to just climb up somewhere and do some big leaps from building to building anymore or dangle over 40 ft drops. I couldn't hit the gym and pile up the plates on the bench or sprint on the treadmill. Worst of all I couldn't throw myself into my dojo time like before. I couldn't focus like before. I was sparring like a complete novice. My pain threshold seemed to have deteriorated somewhat too. I just felt nervous all the time when working with a partner and especially the kids. Always in the back of my mind was that what if. What if I'm applying NiKyo and drop into a seizure? That's a completely smashed radius and ulna for my partner. What if I dropped onto a child? Can you imagine how scared the kids would be if they saw me like that?! All these things constantly ran through my head. To some degree they never left. I took my medication and got a job through a good friend working as a lab tech in a metallurgical lab. Slowly built myself back up and got my confidence. Kept on top of taking my meds every morning and night. Met my missus, had my first son. Stopped taking my meds after the side effects became too bad to deal with (severe depression, loss of inner ear function [balance] sleep disturbance etc.). Had a good couple years off the medication thought I was over it, you hear stories of people having a seizure or a few seizures then they're fine for the rest of their lives. Evidently I'm not one of those people. I don't know what triggered my recent episode but it was scary. And scary for a whole new set of reasons. I'm a parent now and my missus was days away from giving birth. Even now I'm fearful that I could have a twitch or blackout whilst I'm holding my newborn or in the presence of eldest lad. The most recent one was the first time my missus had seen me in such a state, I don't want her to be under that kind of stress again. I've pulled my back pretty bad from convulsing so I'm forced to take it very steady while I recuperate t the moment (it hurts so bad when I sneeze lol). I'm also out of work for a bit too which is a blessing really I can get myself straight without any worries. I don't feel as wary getting back into my training routines now so I'll be going ahead with that regardless. But I'll wait and see if that monster rears its head when I get into the dojo next. I'm not sure of the purpose of this post but it helps just to write it down. Any of you guys have similar experience with major setbacks to your martial arts or any training? Any tips for mid/upper back injuries? Take care and be safe folks.